One of the kids in nursery has what... Eek! Run for the hills!

There I was feeling myself having arrived at T's school gates bang on time after having a good run through the park and streets of London despite the pouring rain. As usual one of the teachers was standing to meet us arriving parents at the gates with a smile; 'he's had a great day', she said to me as I walked by and have become accustomed to and expect. I walked to the door and heard T's name being called out to notify him of my arrival. At the same time, one of the teachers thrust a paper in my hand. I did not think anything out of the ordinary about the paper I was handed; it was usual for them to hand out a school newsletter every Friday after school since T started. Nevertheless, being the curious individual that I am, I took a quick glance at the paper, unlike all the other parents around who just folded theirs and put it in their pockets.

Shock horror, it said there is a case of head lice in the nursery and all the kids might have been exposed and need to have their hair checked with a lice comb ASAP. Forget feeling myself, I felt dirty and itchy all over instantly. Of all the stuff that T could pick up from nursery, a lice infection was one of those that I really dreaded. I scooped him up instantly and we headed to the pharmacy; never mind that it was almost 4PM and I was hungry having had a run and not having eaten lunch yet. Forget just buying a comb, I bought a comb and a lice shampoo because the last thing I wanted was to get home, check his hair, find lice and then have to run back out to get the treatment, if he doesn't have lice, we will save it just in case or use it this time as preventative measure.

Anyway, I checked his hair and I found nothing phew! It is times like this I wish I could just wrap him up in cotton wool but I don't wanna turn him into a recluse or a scaredy cat so what can one do? Boy the perils of nursery LOL. I hope this is the end of this and there won't be more cases like it in future because I just can't deal!

His second day at school

Okay okay I promise this won't turn into a daily update thing about T's admission to nursery before some people start rolling their eyes. After this post I will lay off the topic for a while, unless something significant occurs of course. Moving on swiftly T left for nursery this morning and I was even sadder about it today than I was yesterday. I don't know why, perhaps it was because yesterday I went with him and shared in all the excitement of his first day, whereas today I stayed home while my significant other took him. As I watched him walk out of the door I thought to myself, whoa he has never left me at home like that before! Even though he was only going a few blocks away, I felt as if he was migrating to the other side of the world. Anyway I couldn't help myself and as soon as he was out of the door, my head was out of the window watching him walk up the street until he turned and disappeared into the next street from ours.

All in all, he was just as confident there today as he was yesterday. While some kids still needed their parents around, he was happy for us not to be there and when we turned up to pick him up a few hours later, his teachers complimented him on how good he had been during his stay. Honestly I am completely surprised but thrilled at how well and quickly he is adjusting and settling into school life. He's has taken the whole situation in stride and dealt with it with so much poise . Now if I can only do the same. I'm sure in time, the answer to that will be a yes!

His first day at school

It was T's first day at school today and it went way better than I could have ever expected. Upon arrival at the school gate, we were met by the school's assistant headteacher and before she could even say hello, T was like; my class is that way, having been to the school a few times on some welcome meetings. 'Oh he sure is confident and ready', the assistant head said before giving him the thumbs up and then ushering us on. Usually when introduced to a new person or environment for the first time, T goes into a shell, but not today. He said hello to all his teachers, shook their hands and when he saw his nursery classroom, he just took off exploring everything that was laid out. 'Oh he is so ready', one of his teachers said to me, 'doesn't look like you will have a problem with him settling in at all, he just appears so confident and ready to mingle'. It made me really proud as I watched other kids arrive, cling to their parents and refuse to look or acknowledge the teachers. After staying for about twenty minutes, I left and my other half soon followed, approximately fifteen minutes later. At the end of the day, we were told T was an absolute joy. He didn't fuss at all and made quite an impression on everyone present. Apparently at one point, he picked up a toy guitar and serenaded the whole nursery only to become embarrassed when the audience that had gathered to watch him started to applaud. Overall sounds like an awesome first day and I am so thrilled. I hope he keeps that spirit going.

Goodbye Grandma

Grandma left yesterday to go back home and honestly I am a little sad and miss her. I am not sure how T feels about her leaving though; one moment he says he misses her, and the next moment, he says he doesn't. I think it all boils down to the fact that he is aware that now Grandma is gone, one of us his parents will be home looking after him; and no amount of sweeties or cuddles or naps on 'Grandma's fatty belly', as he likes to say can beat that. I am ever so thankful to my Mum for the assistance she contributed over the summer months and I look forward to her next visit, hopefully in the very near future.

Whoopee we now have a car!

After putting it off for what must have seem like an eternity, we are finally a part of the car generation. I have nothing against public transport but honestly with a child in tow, it is a pain. Apart from the constant dragging around, the inconveniences of getting somewhere quick or the lack thereof of being able to get somewhere without having to connect to several lines or modes of transportation, I was sick of the manners or lack of one and the language T and I have to often put up with from others on public transport. Now that we got a car, we can get so much done within a limited space of time and there are more options to get out and about and explore places that would have been so difficult to get to on public transport. And the best part is I don't have to be worried about some idiot with a potty mouth corrupting T when all we want to do is travel around and get to places in peace. Yes, cars are expensive, but boy they sure are worth it.

Art therapy

What to do when your son tells you he does not like you? Indulge in some art therapy I guess. Just over 2 hours ago, I put T in a timeout for being naughty and unruly. Moments later he uttered those painful words every parents dread,' I don't like you Daddy'! I was so shocked and disappointed, I marched over to him and told him to take it back, which he did. Still reeling and slightly upset after he had gone to bed, I grabbed some pieces of paper  to channel the anger and disappointment I was feeling. I was shocked by what resulted. I have named the pictures 'mean cross daddy' and 'smiley happy daddy'. They are on the wall now and the next time T is being disobedient I can point at them and tell him the choice of which daddy he likes or dislikes, and the daddy he has to deal, lies fully with him.

Back to work blues

It has been over two weeks since I went back to work and oh boy am I exhausted! Before I went back to work, I felt like I hardly had any time in a day. Now that I am back to work, I feel like I am in a race against time and it seems as if I am almost rushing to catch up every time. I rarely ever have time for lunch now. My mornings are as chaotic as ever. And by the time I have to go to bed, I am in a daze wondering where the whole day went.

To make matters worse T is starting to act up over my return to work and he is not happy that I have left him at home to be looked after by my Mum. At first, he was fine with me going out to work and he was really sweet to my Mum. Over the first week, he hardly baited an eyelid as I got ready, picked up my bag and said goodbye: so long as he had something to watch on TV. After the first week, he started to whine a bit about my going to work and I also started to notice some not so nice attitude from him to my mum. Not knowing what to make of it, I started telling him that my mum was there to help as I needed to work so I can earn money for us to buy a shiny new car which he can ride in and also take him on a trip to Disneyland: all true and valid points. It seemed to work for a few days until Tuesday night when I was putting him to bed, he point blank told me he did not want me to go to work anymore. But I have to so we can buy a car and go to Disneyland, I pointed out. 'I want you home to look after me', he answered. But Grandma is here and she can look after you while I am at work, I added. 'No! Grandma can go back to her house and you stay here in our house to look after me', he retorted. We left it at that, me thinking it was just a random conversation. Yesterday morning, soon as he woke up, he hugged me and asked what we were doing for the day. I am going to work and you are staying with Grandma after which I will take you out to play when I get back, I answered. He threw a strop instantly and repeated what he had said the night before about me not going to work: I thought he was playing. A few hours later as I got ready to leave, he asked to go to the toilet so I put him on the toilet. My mum seeing it was time for me to leave stepped in and offered to watch over and wipe him when he was done. Soon as she stepped into the toilet and I stepped out, he started crying and screaming at her to go away because he wanted his daddy. Each time she asked if he was done, she was met with a resounding and emphatic no, I want my daddy. Seeing my mum struggling, I dropped my bag, stepped back in the toilet and asked if he was done. I got a yes at the first time of asking so I wiped him and explained to him once again why I had to go to work. I walked over to the treat cupboard, gave him a treat and he calmed down enough for me to be able to leave for work. When I arrived home in the afternoon, I was informed by my mum that he had wet himself twice and pooed in his pants and during the times he did it, he was standing there just staring at her and did not even say a word afterwards. Now he rarely ever pees himself let alone pooh, yes sometimes he has accidents and when he does, it is mainly because he got carried away and realized late. But to just stand there and pee or pooh without any care... he is mad at me and he is acting out by being very mean and standoffish to my mum- not cool! This morning was the same. Me trying to leave. Him trying for me to to leave. My mum caught in the middle doing all she can to help.
Never one to give up easily, I have been thinking all day and I have my first idea to try out to see if it works. I hardly ever give T treats or sweets because he is such a fussy eater but I am not my mum so I am hoping a little bit of bribery, the oldest trick in the book, would aid his transition from Daddy daycare to Grandma daycare. I have prepared some bags of treats and for the next week, I will instruct my mum to give them to him when I am away at work.

Hopefully that would make him warm to her as he starts to associate their time together as a time to be treated.  I really hope it works because if it does not then I do not know what to do as I am at my wits end. One thing for sure is I am not about to give up work so if he carries on, then it is going to be one long summer for everyone in our household especially my mum who is just doing her bit to help.

Daddy's off to work!

I am off to work today for the first time in 2 years after having taken that whole time off to look after T. Honestly, I am feeling a mixed bag of emotions about it. On one hand I am happy that T will gain some independence and I can go out, purse other goals and in turn make some money which we really need. On the other, I am sad and emotional because T and I have always done everything together and now instead of witnessing things happen to each other, all we will now have is just stories to tell. It is the end of an episode but I am sure many more will come; like when he goes to nursery for the first time for example. I have loved and enjoyed my entire time at home with T and I wish I could continue but unfortunately it is what it is and sadly every episode must come to an end. In the meantime, he is in my Mum's care at home and will be until he starts full time nursery in September. I just hope he is not missing me like I am missing him right now -:(

Grandma is here!

T and I are so excited. We just came back from the airport to pick up my Mum who is meeting him for the first time and will be helping babysit over the summer holidays. I think I have earned some well deserved time off to pursue some other endeavors... don't you all agree?!!

Summer's here!

Which means all the splash pads and pools are gradually opening their gates and doors to the public. I love summer and I hope this year's is just as nice as last year's.

Nursery school admission finalised

Went to T's prospective school yesterday to attend an admission's meeting so the school can find out more about him and his family. Other than some few teething problems with regards to the fact finding form which the school needs to be update to reflect today's modern and diverse society, and T refusing to speak to any of his teachers, everything else was fine. He starts in September and as sad as I am realizing that I will no longer be one half of the major influence in his life, I am very excited that he will make new friends and will learn some lessons I cannot teach him at home there; sharing and realizing he may not always be the centre of attention for example. I have started counting down the day until he starts and I am praying the transition is as easy for me as it is for him. We will wait and see.

Day out to Bournemouth Beach

It was my birthday over the weekend and as a treat, our neighbours and very good friends took us out for the day to Bournemouth Beach. I have to say I was pleasantly surprised by how nice it is. I had always imagined all British seaside towns to be run down and full of bland dodgy gaming centres and amusement arcades hence why I don't associate beach holidays with being in the UK but Bournemouth changed my opinion slightly. Yes the water was not exactly very warm but it was manageable and the beach was very clean. Plus the gradient at the beach is not very steep meaning the water is shallow enough to make dipping with T a much pleasurable experience. I will like to try the Torbay area next. With companies especially airlines bumping up their prices during school holidays and with T starting school real soon, it is worth investigating the options available within the UK.

Visit to Legoland

Just had a fantastic visit to Legoland Windsor resort to mark T's second 'celebration day'. It was a very wet day, probably not the best weather to head out to a theme park in, nevertheless it didn't seem to matter once we got there and at the end of the day, our visit regardless of the rain was well worth it. T and his friend who we went with had so much fun and no surprises he is already asking to go there again. As a result I am hoping to do it big next time and take him on holiday to the original Legoland resort in Billund, Denmark. Fingers crossed!

It's a birthday party

T had his birthday party yesterday and it was a great opportunity to get his friends together in one place, catch up, play, and parrrty! The kids had so much fun playing various games including 'pin the tail on the donkey', 'musical chairs', 'pass the parcel', and the one that proved the most popular, ' a pinata'. Overall it was a great day and a marvelous celebration. We are thankful to everyone that came out to help us celebrate.

Bye bye chickenpox infection

Yippee!!! T's chicken pox infection is over. The last scabs have fallen off and other than the specks and spots which will fade in time, he is fully recovered. He was actually a better patient than I had expected; sweet and in control of his emotions throughout. On one occasion while I was getting him ready for a salt bath, he walked over to the mirror, stared at himself and said to me, 'daddy you gave me chickenpox but it is okay, it will all be gone soon'. That made me feel horrible but also melted my heart at the same time. Other than one night where he didn't sleep due to the discomfort coming from the rash on his scalp and having to lay his head down, he sailed through the whole episode without much fuss. I was most surprised by how he didn't cry and heeded my advise not to scratch the itch because scratching it will leave scars. Instead whenever he felt an itch, he called me, pointed at the spot and I tapped it lightly until he felt better. Having now recovered, it is one less thing for us to worry about concerning him in future.
It was not fun having to spend his birthday with scabs falling off all over his body but at least it will be one birthday to remember when he looks back at the pictures.

Happy Birthday T!

T turned 3 today and as he sits eating his cake I am staring in amazement wondering where all the time has gone. It seems like it was just yesterday he was a baby. Before I know it, he would be all grown and wanting to fly the nest. Happy birthday T. You are an amazing individual and a truly wonderful son. I love you!

The chickenpox menace continues

Having just recovered from my bout of chickenpox, the infection is back and this time T is its victim. The first set of skin rash and bumps appeared yesterday on his chest and armpits and by today, it had spread to his neck, thighs and back. So far he is keeping very well, jumping around and just in general being very boisterous; unlike me during my episode. This morning when I told him we have to put our schedule and routine on hold, he walked over to the mirror, pointed and asked if it was because of the bumps on his chest. Yes, you have chickenpox I answered. 'Did you give it to me'? He asked. Yes, I replied sheepishly. 'That's okay, it will soon be gone', he said. I suppose having seen me recently go through it, he is feeling very positive about it all. Hopefully he doesn't get too many bumps and it is all over soon.

Daddy has chickenpox

As stated earlier this week, the Easter bunny was very kind and brought T lots of chocolate and fun for Easter. For me, however the Easter bunny was rather mean and nasty and instead of bringing all things good, it brought me what I had been dreading for a long time, "chickenpox".
It all started on Good Friday when I woke up feeling slightly feverish. I didn't think anything of it of course and after a quick dose of paracetamol, I was soon back to feeling well again. Saturday was pretty much the same; we had a lot of plans then and other than a slight headache when I woke up, the day passed without much discomfort or issues as we went about our business. Fast forward to Monday and I woke up feeling very sick indeed. My head and joints ached, I felt sapped of energy, and I noticed the lymph nodes beneath both ears at my chin were swollen. We had plans I had been looking forward to on the day however something told me I had to rest and stay indoors so I listened to my head and stayed home. By Monday evening, I noticed that my whole scalp felt inflamed and there was a tiny red bump on my left shoulder blade. That was when it hit me that I may have chickenpox. When I woke up on Tuesday morning, what was one tiny red bump had multiplied and my back, abdomen, chest and entire head was covered in little pus filled bumps. By Tuesday evening, I was feeling very itchy and uncomfortable, and I just wanted to grab a blade and scrape off my entire head of hair because I just kept getting this wave of painful sensation that went around my head in a circle as if someone was hammering hundred of needles down each hair follicle in procession. The Doctor who I had called earlier for advise came over, gave me an examination, confirmed I had chickenpox and put me on a prescription of antibiotics so as to limit any complications arising from my infection. Overnight I realized I could not lay my head down to sleep because regardless which way I tried; the pressure exerted by me pressing my head against my hands or on a pillow was just totally unbearable. Wednesday was the worst. Every inch of my upper body was itchy, I had a massive fever, I was exhausted and I just felt totally horrible and dirty every time I looked in the mirror. At one point I became fixated on the time and sat there looking at the clock as it ticked wishing I had the power to will time by so I did not have to go through the discomfort I was experiencing. By mid afternoon, I had reached a low point so I draped a blanket over my head and started to rock back and forth telling myself I have survived worse and this too shall soon pass. When it was bedtime, I barred myself to the living room sofa knowing sleeping in the bedroom will mean keeping the entire household awake. I was right because I did not sleep a wink that night.
It is Saturday morning now and I am feeling more energized and much better on my way to recovery. All my bumps have scabbed over and some are actually starting to fall off. The itch though as much as I would like it to stop has not stopped completely and I find myself struggling not to submit and itch here and there. Just gross!

Moving on swiftly, as much as I had dreaded being infected with chickenpox, I am also glad that between T and I (my other half is immune and has been looking after T this entire period), I got infected first and it was not the other way. So far T is showing no symptoms and that is very surprising considering he has been around me the whole time and I have an inkling we were both exposed when I became infected. Anyway that is unimportant now and what matters is that when and if he gets infected, I will be ready knowing what it feels like and what remedies to use to help him ease the discomfort. Speaking of remedies, I found Calamine lotion absolutely useless and after two days of using it and being fed up with its ineffectiveness and messiness, I switched to another product called, 'Eurex', which was recommended by T's godmother and found it generally more effective. I also tried soaking myself in a bath of 'Dead Sea Spa Magik salt', as recommended by the many users of Netmums, although I am not exactly sure if it had any real effect or not. I did feel amazing immediately after having the bath but if that is down to some placebo effect or not, I do not know and will not comment further LOL!

Consequently, in the past when people had spoken about chickenpox I have often wondered if it really is as nasty as they have described it. Now that it has happened to me, I believe it is. I have been ill too many times in the past to remember every episode bar a few but I will certainly remember this for sure. The level of discomfort and helplessness I felt was just too great to forget and I am glad it is a once in a lifetime type of infection phew! Now if this dark spots on my face can just all disappear immediately. Boy recovery is still a long way yet.

Happy Easter

Hope the Easter Bunny was kind to you and yours. T requested and got for himself a monstrous amount of treats and chocolates! Cannot wait to do it again next year.

Knee trouble equals afternoon spent in A&E

T has been complaining on and off for a while now about pain in his right knee. So when on the way to the park today he suddenly stopped riding his scooter and started limping and complaining about this same knee, I had no option but to head to A&E. The change of destination did not go down well of course; he threw a massive tantrum when he learned we were heading to the hospital instead of the park and I had to scoop him up and bribe him with a lollipop in order to have his compliance and cooperation.
Upon reaching the hospital, we were called to see a pediatrician within 5 minutes of signing-in which was pretty impressive. After a thorough examination by a doctor and an x-ray of his hip and knee, I was instructed he had no fractures and the pain might just be as a result of a sore ligament or muscle fatigue brought upon by boisterous play and tiredness. Nevertheless as a precaution they sent us away with some paracetamol and ibuprofen and told us to come back next week for a routine follow-up. When it was time to leave, T turned to the doctor and asked if he could stay in the hospital to get more x-ray. From not wanting to go to the hospital, he now wanted to stay. I was like, em no thanks! I think I'll prefer us going home and never coming back in a long time. I sure hope he does not go and do something now so he can go back to the hospital LOL!
Consequently I have to say being my second time with him at A&E that I was as impressed this time around as I was the first time. Overall we were there for about 2.5 hours which is way shorter than I had expected and budgeted for. So when I come across people moaning and complaining about the NHS, I wonder if I am just lucky or perhaps less fussy because I only have good things to say about it. Of course the NHS is not perfect but I am grateful for it and all the wonderful people within it that do such amazing jobs in a very difficult and demanding environment.

A huge lesson

On our way to meet a friend, T and I stopped over at a playground to play. We hadn't been there 10 minutes when this lady and her daughter walked in and instantly some "Mompetition" ensued. For those who are not in the know, the urban dictionary defines "Mompetition" as the one-up rivalry Mums (who are seen as primary givers) play in order to make their children seem better, smarter, and/or more advanced than your child. Anyway back to this lady and her daughter: everything T did, the little girl with mum urging her on did. She was faster taking turns on the slide and was happy to shout about it with mum applauding, and when they played on the carousel she had a good laugh about how terrified T was and how she wasn't when it was spinning really fast. We went on the swing and there she was on the next swing. T started to sing and of course so did she, only louder. When T asked to go higher, she also requested that her mum pushed her higher. Mum of course pushed so hard I thought her daughter might fall out of the swing at any minute. Wanting to shake the irritating duo off, T and I headed to the jungle gym in a different part of the playground but to our annoyance they weren't too far behind. The jungle gym had different levels of difficulty so I followed T and kept instructing him to hold on and pay attention as he made his way along. Little Miss duplicator soon caught up of course, I mean she is only about year or two older and as a result was quicker. I watched as she shoved T out of the way, raced past him, completed the course and then embarked on it again. Moments later she reached a portion of the course that involved crossing via a narrow piece of rectangular wooden log. Intent on catching up with T again so she could show him up, she was going quite fast and was looking right ahead at us instead of at the obstacle in front of her. Suddenly she tripped and fell. She let out a loud painful scream as she landed hard on the wooden log and was only saved from falling off completely by the safety ropes that were tied into a mesh on both sides of the wooden log. I could only watch in horror as Mum came to her aid clearly distressed and filled with pity. She picked her up and they both walked off nursing her bruised elbow and ego. When I saw them leaving the park, I was tempted to run after them and ask if the daughter was alright but I had my own child who was still on the jungle gym to look after plus I had just won a game of "Mompetition" so I just looked on and hoped both mother and child had learned their lesson.

When T grows older, I will tell him this story and the moral of it being worry less about what others are doing and focus on what you are doing for you could end up loosing all that you have worked hard for trying to keep up with others if you do not keep up with your own self. 

Stencil magic

T and I went out to Hobbycraft last week and soon as he saw this alphabet, numbers and symbols stencil, he wanted it. Thinking he wouldn't have any use for it, I refused to buy it at first but he nagged me until I relented and bought it. I am so glad I did because copying it in and then announcing to the whole house that he can write numbers and alphabets is now his favorite thing to do in the morning.

Children and their toys: A toy story

Here is a fascinating piece about children across the world and their favourite collection of toys. When I read that the photographer had said based on his observations that the richest children were more possessive compared to children in poorer countries who even if they only had two or three toys didn't really care, I couldn't help but nod in agreement.

An afternoon with daddy at the cinema

T has been asking to see The Muppets: Most Wanted ever since he saw the trailer and since I am a big fan of The Muppets I thought why not. He had been to the cinema before with my other half to see Mr Peabody and Sherman and I was told he was good through most of the showing. Anyway I should have known he had other plans today when just as we were leaving home he said, ‘yes I am going to go to the cinema and the man there will give me a big bag of popcorn’. We got to the cinema and sure enough he asked for and got popcorn. The rest of our time in the cinema was then spent concentrating on the overpriced popcorn and half-watching the movie. Other than when Miss Piggy performed the Macarena which he actually got up and danced to, he was like whatever, eating loudly and yapping away the whole time. He only really seemed to go quiet and pay attention to the movie whenever there was a loud bang or when Miss Piggy was on screen.  Big Miss Piggy fan like me then I think.  The movie was actually very good and I enjoyed it very much by the way. As we left the cinema, T pointed to a poster of Rio 2. He thinks he is going back to the cinema again next week to see it. However I think he can wait until it comes out on DVD. If he wants popcorn I will gladly buy it for him at the local supermarket for a fraction of what they sell it for at the cinema.

Question!

Why is it that when I am folding clothes after doing laundry around T, I feel like a matador? What is it about toddlers that just makes them want to run all up in clean clothes or jump up and down in them. Grrr not impressed!

Funny moment: Candice Vs. candies

In a case of what I said vs what he heard, I was in the kitchen getting breakfast ready muttering away to myself when T walked in. 

'Daddy who are you talking to? He asked.

My invisible friends. I answered with a shrug.

Looking puzzled, he asked: 'Huh, what is an invisible friend'?

Friends of mine that I can see but you can't see. I have loads of them and their name all starts with the letter C. Like Cassandra!

'I don't like Cassandra', he retorted.

Chloe?

'I don't like her'!

Clarissa?

'I don't like her'!

Chandra?

'I don't like her'!

Candice?

'Huh'?

Candice?

'Candies'?!!! His eyes lit up. 'Oh I like her, she can stay'. 

A new reward chart

Everyone who follows my updates on this blog will know by how now how much of a hard time I have sometimes trying to get T to eat. Last night, I made him what I perceived to be his favourite meal, cous-cous only to have him turn up his nose at it saying he was not hungry. He wanted the pop-corn he had spotted in the kitchen earlier of course instead but didn't dare say it. Anyway I didn't say a word, I simply put his food in a takeaway plate and put him to bed almost soon afterwards. Around 11pm he woke up and was screaming his head off for no apparent reason. When I asked what was wrong, he wouldn't say so I had no option but to tell him to go back to sleep and stop fussing. About 30 mins afterwards he settled down and went back to sleep so I went to bed. Moments later, he was up and crying again and the worst part was he wasn't saying what was wrong so had no option but to wait it out till he settled. The trend continued for the most part of the night until at 3:45AM when he woke up crying again, I had an eureka moment. I fetched the food I had put away earlier, told him to sit eat in bed and surprise, surprise he started chowing down. When he was done, he went back to sleep, never to wake until 8AM. As I laid back down to sleep after the whole drama, I started thinking of what to do. By morning I had come up with an idea of a reward chart that incorporates good eating habits with good behaviour.  Everytime he eats a decent portion of his meal, he gets 2 stars in his favourite colour, yellow. When he is good he gets a green star. When he is horrid or naughty or doesn't eat a decent portion of his meal, he gets a star in the colour he is least keen on, orange. At the end of the end, the amount of stars he has amassed in each category is totaled and the figure from the subtraction of the orange stars from yellow and green stars determine if he receives his favorite treat of "Haribo" or not the next day at lunch time. A total of +5 and above in favour of good behaviour equals a whole Haribo mini-bag; anything between +1 and +4 equals that number in single Haribo gummies; and anything below 0 means a good talking to at bedtime and no Haribo gummies. In addition to learning the life lesson of rewarding good behaviour, I hope having him present while we count and add up his numbers at night will aid his number and counting skills. Just yesterday I was sitting watching him play with a peg board and I was stunned when he counted each peg as he picked it up to stick in the board up to 15. He is remarkably clever and ever since I explained the reward chart to him this morning, has been on his best behaviour. He is on 4 yellow and 1 green star so far, and no oranges so fingers crossed.

Trip to Warks and the Black Country

T has his first proper trip in the UK this week. As part of the trip, we took in Warwick, Royal Lemington Spa and the West Midlands Safari park. We also had quite the drive around the UK's second largest city, Birmingham, and the towns of Stourbridge, Hagley and Kidderminster, thanks to not having Sat-Nav and getting lost at the interchange between the M40 and the M42 on the journey westwards. All in all we had a great time. I was particularly in awe of the striking dissimilarities between  the architecture in Royal Lemington Spa and Warwick, and I loved the Safari Park tour. T on the other hand preferred his time chilling in the hotel and was quite keen to get the Safari tour ended so he could head straight to the rides at the Safari theme park. Certainly can't wait for our next trip.

New gadgets

Goodbye running to the fridge to fill T's water bottle with water from the filter jug. Goodbye running to the store to pick up bottled water when we are out and about, and run out. Hello 'Bobble', and the ability to fill up from municipal drinking water anywhere: it's nice to meet you!

And it doesn't stop there. I just got myself a new electric toothbrush so it is only right T wants and gets one too.

He made himself a ring

T and I woke up this morning and soon as we walked into the living room, he spotted a piece of his DIY tool kit and some left over foami piece on the floor. Almost immediately he sat down and got busy with them while I went to the kitchen and started making breakfast. Moments later, I got a tap on my thigh. Look I made myself a ring, he said, showing off his creation. I love it!

See ya later Winter

I want to say it has been a long dark winter but I cannot remember waking up in the morning to any snow or icy frost this winter; all I remember is there was a lot of rain. Anyways, over the last few days the sun has been making a much welcome and needed appearance and oh boy am I glad. At some point yesterday the temperature on my phone was indicating 20 degrees... in March!!! Well that wass just fantastic and we made sure we made the most of it by spending a good part of the afternoon in the park. Hopefully the sunny weather is here to stay because Lord knows we have had enough rain and staying indoors this year already. I will be keeping my fingers very crossed indeed.

Happy Pancake day

Hope yours was delicious and scrumptious because ours definitely was!

Growth Spurts

Two weeks ago when T and I went to the clinic and the pediatrician told me that at the rate at which he is growing, he is likely to be over 6 feet tall. I was thinking in my head tell me what I don't know. He is only 3 months short of his 3rd birthday and he is already 3.2 feet tall. I just tried to put him in a set of clothing and they are too small on him... he has hardly worn the clothes for 6 months! This is so typical these days. We bought him 2 sets of pyjamas when we were in the States in November,  less than 3 months later and the tops are already too skimpy and every time he puts them on he looks like he has a cropped top on. I guess I do not notice the growth spurts because I see him every day and the only time it ever dawns on me is when he is not fitting in clothes I expect him to fit in. We only just cleared out his wardrobe and bought some new clothes and already it's time for another wardrobe overhaul. Sigh!

Awesome new arts and craft creations

Went from this...

To this, thanks to the help of some few YouTube tutorials

Have fun playing with them T x

The first alphabet he wrote himself

And T’s first self-penned alphabet is... the letter X! He writes it on his teeth brushing chart twice a day by himself now.

Here comes the lies

T told his first lie today. I told him to eat his lunch and while attending to some chores in the next room and noticed through the reflection in the mirror that instead of eating he was playing with a pen that was lying within arms rich on the table. Are you eating? I asked. Yes, he answered. Moments later, he heard my footsteps approaching. In the same mirror, I spied him dropping the pencil, pick up the spoon and pretend as if he as busy eating. Soon as I came into the room where he was, he looked up at me, smiled and without me asking, he said, I am eating! I could only feign a smile at the lie. Hopefully he doesn't make it a habit.

A lot to say on the issue of term time holidays

There are some pieces of legislation I come across sometimes that just renders me speechless for a brief moment before I have an out pouring of words I have to beg myself to stop. Many like the hateful spate of anti-homosexual bills being issued by numerous backward nations around the world at the moment or Arizona’s ongoing ludicrous religious rights bill do not make it on to here for specific reasons. The UK government’s amendment to the Education Act which basically criminalizes parents for taking their children out of school during term time for holiday or extended leave purposes has to though. If you are not aware of this amendment or have never read a word of it, it is available and explained here.

The issue of taking children out of school to enjoy a break away with family has long been a decisive one. So it is no surprise that with the new amendment and the difficulties some parents are facing, the matter is back in the news and is currently being examined and debated by parliament. This follows a father’s rant which went viral about how much he had to pay to take his family abroad on holiday during the school holiday period. So why now is parliament just examining and debating this law you ask? How did they not do it before signing it into law you wonder? Yes, while we were worrying about other issues like the recession, jobs, recovery, immigration, Romania, Scotland, EU and all that other mess, these sets of politicians were busying coming up with all sorts of ideas, some of which escaped the public’s eye and got made law before anyone could raise an objection; this amendment is one of them.

Moving on swiftly, it has only been 6 months since the amendment was made and people are starting to be up in arms. On one hand, we have the group that say this amendment is a necessary evil. On the other, we have those that say it is straight ridiculous and amount to dictatorship. I am with the latter. The former including the very annoying Education Secretary that keeps tweaking and messing with the education system have listed a whole range of points why this amendment is necessary, these three stand out the most to me

1.      Parents that take their children out of school during term time to holiday abroad are displaying a lack of commitment to their children’s learning.

2.      Children who miss a few day of school miss out on important teaching and learning and this absence can seriously harm their progress and attainment plus it can impact other children’s learning

3.      Holidaying abroad is a luxury, not a right or necessity so if you cannot afford to go abroad during the school holidays then holiday here in the UK

Typical holiday price comparison chart by the Daily Mail

One can only laugh and watch haplessly as rich politicians who have no clue about what it is like to work in a dead end job for peanuts, pass judgments on regular everyday people who are struggling to do the best for themselves and their families. I sat down and below are my thoughts about the three points above.

1.      This is true but only to a certain extent. Formal learning is important but so is the informal learning part so what parents contribute to their child’s education outside of school should never be overlooked especially the self-esteem part. One of the biggest problems in society today is our over-reliance on the formal education system. Too many parents rely entirely on the school system and teachers to parent and teach their children while forgetting that teachers and the school system can only do so much. A teacher can lecture children about people skills or forming and creating good relationships day in day out but it is through spending quality time with others including parents, friends and family in the context of culture, community and the environment that children really learn to build good relationships and develop an excellent sense of self and true belonging. Look at all these kids walking the streets of our big cities these days. Many of them have gone to school, gained qualifications upon qualifications yet they have no real self-esteem or a sense of belonging. They have no time for anyone, they have no common sense, they don’t respect anybody, and they feel disconnected from everything and everyone around them within the community. I am sure somebody told them about respect, care and personal responsibility in school but have they did they have the opportunity or the environment outside of school to apply it? Probably not. Also just because people send their children to school 24/7 does not mean they are committed to their learning; for many it is just a case of transferring responsibility so they can attend to other issues like work, money, etc. The next time there is an unexpected school closure due to the weather or strike, peep the numbers of parents on TV moaning about the mild inconvenience of having to be stuck at home with their children for a few days and you will see what I mean.
On to another level before I move on to the next point, when you are an immigrant the situation gets even more complex. I for example do not know any teacher that can teach my son about his family’s cultural origin and people considering my partner and I are immigrants with the bulk or our families living abroad. So if we decide to take him out of school during term because that is when we can afford the costs or we/they can get time off work so we can experience what it is like being together with our family, does that mean we are not committed to our son’s learning? Just last year we went with our son to the US to celebrate Thanksgiving with family and we were thinking it will be the last time we will be able to do that considering he starts school in September and Thanksgiving is not a holiday in the UK. Is it fair to have something that has such a major cultural impact on us and we would like to pass to our children taken away? What about penalizing all the people that would like to celebrate Eid, Durga Puja, weddings, funerals, you name it with family abroad considering the number of immigrants in this country and these not being UK holidays? Shall we just say that is their problem or do their situation just not matter?

When you are an immigrant the situation gets even more complex. I for example do not know any teacher that can teach my son about his family’s cultural origin and people considering my partner and I are immigrants with the bulk or our families living abroad. So if we decide to take him out of school during term because that is when we can afford the costs or we/they can get time off work so we can experience what it is like being together with our family, does that mean we are not committed to our son’s learning? Just last year we went with our son to the US to celebrate Thanksgiving with family and we were thinking it will be the last time we will be able to do that considering he starts school in September and Thanksgiving is not a holiday in the UK. Is it fair to have something that has such a major cultural impact on us and we would like to pass to our children taken away? What about penalizing all the people that would like to celebrate Eid, Durga Puja, weddings, funerals, you name it with family abroad considering the number of immigrants in this country and these not being UK holidays? Shall we just say that is their problem or do their situation just not matter?

2.      Unless a child is constantly absent from school or they have had a long spell of absence, this is untrue. The same way people argue that a short break will make a child fall behind in school, one could argue that a short break may be what they need to refresh and kick start their motivation for learning. I was in that situation years ago aged 11 in my first year of secondary school back in Africa when I had major surgery for complicated appendicitis and missed over 7 weeks of school. After I was healed, I rejoined my class and sat the same exams everyone sat without favors. At the end of the term, I was bench-marked 47^th out of 49 students in the class. Knowing I would have to repeat the class if I did not improve and not wanting to, I was motivated to study and work harder and by the end of that school calendar year when benchmarks for the entire year was released I had improved and placed 9^th out of 49 students. If a child suddenly stops progressing or performing in school, then it is up to the school to work with the parents to determine the underlying cause. Are there issues such as distractions outside of school? Is there a lack of parental support with assignments and homework? Or is there an non-diagnosed disability or condition involved? Blaming a short leave of absence for the reason a children fails to progress at school just sounds phony. Many parents want the best for their children so I don’t see why they would take them out of school knowing it will hinder their progress. What I see are parents who are trying to do the best for their children and teachers who are trying their hardest to do as much as they can. Perhaps schools and parents need to work better together for the children’s sake but how does this amendment help that? It does nothing other than  penalize parents for daring to make what they think is the best decision for their family, think about all the low paid people on zero hour contracts that can only have time off work at certain periods. Do they not deserve to have a break with their family when they can?
3.      Of course I am sure many people would rather holiday in the UK if they can but everyone who has ever seen the school holiday period prices of train companies (that is if you don’t have to ride on a bus because of engineering works), Butlins and Centre Parcs will understand why the likes of Ryanair and Easyjet do great during school holidays. Bring on-board the crazy unpredictable UK weather and you will understand why people who live in the UK like to travel abroad to the Sunshine when they have the opportunity? The introduction of Air Passenger duty (APD) has not helped either. Add that on top of airlines putting up prices during the school holiday periods and holidays begin to get out of reach for a lot of people. Indeed on recent air tickets I had bought recently, APD actually exceeded the price I paid for the seat itself. So it is no wonder people want to pull their children out of school to go on holiday when they spot discounts they can afford. In a nutshell many working parents are so priced out of the market during school holiday periods they have to resort to desperate means if their children are ever to have a holiday. I even read the story of a parent who actually took his kids out of school and was happy to pay the fine levied by their school on return because the total worked out cheaper than what he would have paid minus the fine during the school holiday period. Bearing that in mind as well as all the other crazy levies that have been introduced in the past, one has to wonder what this law will really achieve other than to line someone’s pockets; the school, government, whoever because Lord  knows who gets to keeps the fine. Also is it right that politicians in Westminster who enjoys the bulk of summer off and have deep pockets get to legislate and control when the rest of us the working population goes or cannot go on a holiday with our families considering the cost of a holiday is not something they or their corporate friends will never have to worry about?

It is unclear where this parliamentary debate regarding this issue will lead to. Will they decide to regulate prices during school holidays? That sounds impossible! Will they stagger school holidays across the England during the school year? Heaven knows! Or will this amendment be struck down and parents handed back some controls about the decisions they make regarding their children’s day to day education and learning? We will see. One thing is clear though and that is this government needs to step back and stop acting like a dictatorship especially regarding the educational system. Since this government took power, there has been change after change to the education system, every other day there is another change or announcement. It is no wonder teachers are fed up and have announced a strike for next month. There is only so much they can take and guess what, parents might be next. The current education secretary is so unpopular one wonders why he is still in the job. I have watched him a couple of times on TV and I find him quite the cocky, talkative and slippery kind and we all know what cocky talkative slippery characters did to our economy. Thus, I rest my case.

On drinking alcohol while pregnant

I am not sure exactly of what to make of the case of the council in north west England planning to lodge a criminal injuries compensation case at the Court of Appeal for a six-year-old girl who was born with foetal alcohol spectrum disorder. If you haven't read the story, here it is. Apparently the girl mother's drank excessively while the girl was in her womb and now the council is seeking to prosecute the mother for maliciously administering poison so as to endanger life or inflict grievous bodily harm under section 23 of the Offences Against the Person Act 1861.
Seriously I do not get some people. You wouldn't knowingly feed alcohol or anything you know would harm your children to them so why would you consume things that over time science has confirmed could harm your unborn foetus? Is a lack of education responsible? Or rather a reckless and selfish attitude? Those aside, do these people even think of the lifetime of burden, issues and difficulties they will put their children through as a result of the avoidable damage? Or the amount of money it costs if these kids are taken into care or require constant medical support? Probably not so perhaps it is time to start making people pay when found to have been willingly careless or neglectful while pregnant! It is annoying and distressing to think that kids who did not ask to be born are put into these situations and considering the numerous sacrifice many parents make for their kids, people like these (who cannot give up alcohol drugs, or smoking for just 9 months) are actually having kids. I mean where is the love, care, sacrifice or compassion?!!!
It would be interesting to see which way this case goes because it might set a precedent for other similar cases in the UK; according to statistics, around 7,000 children a year are born in England and Wales with foetal alcohol syndrome as a result of their mother's abuse of alcohol while pregnant. One way or another, each one of these kids deserve some type of justice. 

Happy Valentine's day

T made cards at playgroup today and I was so glad when the teacher asked who the cards are for, he mentioned us his parents, not his best pals, L and B. I am so going to treasure this and every other cards he makes and dedicates to me while I can because heaven knows, he'll soon grow up and this won't be the case every time anymore. Sending abundant love to you all today and always x

Awesome article

Here is an article about parenting I just read and and think everyone should read. Enjoy!

Smart pants

There I was singing "Hip Hop Reindeer", while we were walking down the street when T goes, 'Stop singing that, it is not Christmas'! I turned to him and asked how he knew it wasn't Christmas. 'The lights aren't on. There is no snow. The trees are gone. Santa and the Elves aren't here. And it is just winter', he responded. This boy LOL... such smarty pants!