Back to work blues

It has been over two weeks since I went back to work and oh boy am I exhausted! Before I went back to work, I felt like I hardly had any time in a day. Now that I am back to work, I feel like I am in a race against time and it seems as if I am almost rushing to catch up every time. I rarely ever have time for lunch now. My mornings are as chaotic as ever. And by the time I have to go to bed, I am in a daze wondering where the whole day went.

To make matters worse T is starting to act up over my return to work and he is not happy that I have left him at home to be looked after by my Mum. At first, he was fine with me going out to work and he was really sweet to my Mum. Over the first week, he hardly baited an eyelid as I got ready, picked up my bag and said goodbye: so long as he had something to watch on TV. After the first week, he started to whine a bit about my going to work and I also started to notice some not so nice attitude from him to my mum. Not knowing what to make of it, I started telling him that my mum was there to help as I needed to work so I can earn money for us to buy a shiny new car which he can ride in and also take him on a trip to Disneyland: all true and valid points. It seemed to work for a few days until Tuesday night when I was putting him to bed, he point blank told me he did not want me to go to work anymore. But I have to so we can buy a car and go to Disneyland, I pointed out. 'I want you home to look after me', he answered. But Grandma is here and she can look after you while I am at work, I added. 'No! Grandma can go back to her house and you stay here in our house to look after me', he retorted. We left it at that, me thinking it was just a random conversation. Yesterday morning, soon as he woke up, he hugged me and asked what we were doing for the day. I am going to work and you are staying with Grandma after which I will take you out to play when I get back, I answered. He threw a strop instantly and repeated what he had said the night before about me not going to work: I thought he was playing. A few hours later as I got ready to leave, he asked to go to the toilet so I put him on the toilet. My mum seeing it was time for me to leave stepped in and offered to watch over and wipe him when he was done. Soon as she stepped into the toilet and I stepped out, he started crying and screaming at her to go away because he wanted his daddy. Each time she asked if he was done, she was met with a resounding and emphatic no, I want my daddy. Seeing my mum struggling, I dropped my bag, stepped back in the toilet and asked if he was done. I got a yes at the first time of asking so I wiped him and explained to him once again why I had to go to work. I walked over to the treat cupboard, gave him a treat and he calmed down enough for me to be able to leave for work. When I arrived home in the afternoon, I was informed by my mum that he had wet himself twice and pooed in his pants and during the times he did it, he was standing there just staring at her and did not even say a word afterwards. Now he rarely ever pees himself let alone pooh, yes sometimes he has accidents and when he does, it is mainly because he got carried away and realized late. But to just stand there and pee or pooh without any care... he is mad at me and he is acting out by being very mean and standoffish to my mum- not cool! This morning was the same. Me trying to leave. Him trying for me to to leave. My mum caught in the middle doing all she can to help.
Never one to give up easily, I have been thinking all day and I have my first idea to try out to see if it works. I hardly ever give T treats or sweets because he is such a fussy eater but I am not my mum so I am hoping a little bit of bribery, the oldest trick in the book, would aid his transition from Daddy daycare to Grandma daycare. I have prepared some bags of treats and for the next week, I will instruct my mum to give them to him when I am away at work.

Hopefully that would make him warm to her as he starts to associate their time together as a time to be treated.  I really hope it works because if it does not then I do not know what to do as I am at my wits end. One thing for sure is I am not about to give up work so if he carries on, then it is going to be one long summer for everyone in our household especially my mum who is just doing her bit to help.